Cohen (CCU)
Personal Life Cohen is a 24 year old man who runs the city of Cohenville, he is also a father of his son and daughter (BabyCohen and Audrey respectively). He always wakes up at the same time, every morning, 6:48AM. He does this so he can go downstairs and have some time to himself, after all, the kids can be kind of chaotic sometimes. Cohen is also known to be a "master chef" (he sucks at cooking). However, his homemade Mashed Potatoes are a famous recipe that the entire city wants to know, but he doesn't care enough to reveal. Cohen has one of the biggest egos of any character in the entire CCU. An example of this would be when he said: "I'm '''THE BEST' character in the CCU!" ~Cohen Which as we all know, is a complete lie. As the mayor of the city, Cohen has big responsibilities, and he also has a sweet secretary, Isabelle! As the mayor, his goal for the city is simply to make it a better place to live. He went up against Ken for the election of mayor, so it's not like he had any real competition. Cohen has shown to actually care about his children and their success now, he USED to not care at all and would simply torment them, but now, he's a surprisingly decent father figure. However, he's had his fair share of... 'CRIMES!' Criminal Record * ''Theft: ''Cohen has gone on record to steal people's belongings before, this includes: Woofitz' hay day money, Juliana's watermelons, Everett's car, people's credit cards, '''people's ideas', and more! * Kidnapping: On several occurrences Cohen has shoved people into his van and drove off with them. Speaking of which... * Child Abduction: ''Cohen has also shoved children into the back of his van and drove off with them. A famous example would be that time he kidnapped BabyCohen (when Juliana had custody of him, big mistake) and used him for a science experiment, because he needed his blood. * ''Assault: ''Cohen has verbally. physically and sexually assaulted many people ever since he was in kindergarten. He's most famous for his outbursts though, oh boy. * ''Rape: ''Cohen has gone on record to rape several people, most were under the age of consent (18). This makes him a pedophile, speaking of which... * ''Pedophilia: ''Cohen often tries to have the funny sex with children!! WTF COHEN PEDO * ''Homicide/Murder: ''Cohen once murdered a dude, admittedly if he didn't he would've been killed, so, I guess that's fair enough? * ''Drug Abuse: ''Cohen used to be addicted to fentanyl, methamphetamine, morphine, crack, cocaine, heroine and alprazolam. * ''Owning Child Pornography: ''Cohen owns "The Guy Game", which consists of a 17 year old girl showing her titties, WHAT THE FUCK PEDOPHILE OMG EW WTFFFFFF!!!! * ''Breaking and Entering: ''Cohen has broken into people's homes on many occasions, he's most famous for kicking the door down then causally walking inside of the victim's home. While he's in the house he could do multiple things, but still, he never asked for consent to enter. * ''Being a White Person Named "Tyrone": ''As we know, Cohen's real name is "Tyrone", the problem is, only BLACK PEOPLE CAN BE NAMED TYRONE! And he's white, not only is this racist, but it's also illegal. * ''Being a Gamer: ''Cohen is a hardcore Minecraft gamer, that may sound fine, but in case you forgot, all games do is cause violence, duh. So he's gonna be a shooter sooner or later. To solve the problem owning video games was made illegal. AND HE OWNS AND PLAYS THEM WTFFFFF * ''Identity Theft: ''Cohen has stolen several people's identities and used them to his advantage. Each time was worse than the last. Though he did eventually stop, he can still be held accountable for his actions on making innocent people look like fools and bad people. * ''Terrorism: ''Cohen blew up two McGurgles ''in a fit of rage, he killed a total of 53 people from both establishments, and had to pay $104,502 in fees. * ''Child Endangerment: ''Cohen permitted Juliana, a 12 year old with more crimes to her name than Cohen himself, to live on her own with his son BabyCohen and Audrey. If that isn't enough he allowed them to remain in Juliana's custody for an extended period of time. Diagnoses * ''Anxiety: ''Cohen has gone on to have multiple anxiety attacks, this is proof that he has anxiety. Nobody knows how bad the anxiety is however. * ''Autism: ''Cohen was diagnosed with autism at a rather young age, the type is unknown though. * ''Terminal Cancer: ''Although it isn't 100% confirmed, Cohen has said before "Guys I have terminal cancer and only have 6 months left to live". Meaning he might have terminal cancer.